Not the trip, the food, the people or the fun. No, the packing. The packing looms.
I know it's coming when I wake up on a Sunday morning and the bathroom scale is in the middle of the livingroom floor. This means that Adventure Boy is beginning calibration of items to the exact kilo (a conversion he does in his mind, because he is Adventure Boy), and we're at the beginning of what will be a 3-week juggling of clothes, shoes, power tools, American liquor as bribes for DJs, and guitar picks.
The dog will notice. He always does. He'll sniff the bags and the scale - he'll spend slightly more time inside, where he can watch us. He'll get edgier. The UPS guy will notice and will go back to honking from his truck in the driveway, not risking the wrath of what truly could be a chow/wolfman hybrid with too much on his mind on the porch.
He'll follow the car down the driveway, barking and yipping - snapping at the tires (this, one of his most detrimental flaws - chasing everything that moves), and he'll know we'll be gone a long time (in dog years).
"Poor little guy," Adventure Boy will say.
"Poor strangers who come to the door," I will say,
"and by the way, who's manning the shock collar?"
"Oh, I think he's learned his lesson," he'll respond, confidently, as always.
"In what way do you think, though? Because you haven't zapped him once," I'll counter, pithily.
"I think he just knows," he'll defend. Ah.. the eternal springing of hope.
Nonetheless, in about three weeks, we'll drive away, leaving the PostMan and the UPS guy and Studio Clients, and all manner of woodland creature to their own devices. And the dog will miss us for an hour or so, until he forgets that we used to be there because he's chasing a neighbor's tractor.
The cats won't care that we're gone. They never do.
They're looking strangely contented lately. I'm slightly suspicious that they're reading the shock collar manual at night while everyone sleeps.
I don't mention this suspicion to Adventure Boy.
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On the other hand, the cats here are aware of your return and are shredding the furniture to make you a nest.
ReplyDeleteChessley