Tuesday, April 6, 2010

88 & 89 - Two answers in one

Well, I just got nowhere near cyberspace yesterday, being in the back seat of a car with no wireless card.  So today, I offer two answers for the price of one.

We crossed the German border inauspiciously, and only noticed because there was suddenly no speed limit.  Which is about the coolest thing that can happen to an American on a Monday afternoon.


There are places on the Autobahn where there is an occasional speed limit, but for the most part, you just barrel down the road and get the hell out of the way of the folks that are barreling faster.

So, here's the first question:
What is with the human desire to hurl ourselves through space as fast as possible?  In light of the fact that we're not made of some bitchin and indestructable carbon fiber and mostly turn into mush when coming in contact with static objects, while hurling ourselves through space? Or, if we're going fast enough, just fly apart entirely?

I postulate that it's simply because we're comprised of billions of particles that are whirring and buzzing all the time.  All this solidity, all this static - just an illusion imposed upon us by our monkey brains.  Maybe we like moving so fast because it's just closer to our natural state.

Yeah, I know, you're thinking, 'Holy smokes, what a genius you must be considered in parts of Upper Slobovia and beyond.. what with thinking all these deep thoughts!'

And while the Upper Slobovians DO, in fact, consider me a genius of immeasurable breadth, I offer the following:

Why can't the U.S. have an Autobahn?  Why do we have to have speed limits?  The German auto accident rate, per capita, is considerably lower and they can drive as fast as they want.  So, what the..?

This one's simple.  If the statistic is true that 1 in every 100 Americans is in jail, I think it stands to reason that if we could drive as fast as we wanted, we'd probably just take the opportunity to drive ourselves to jail at an even faster rate than we currently do.

And well, I think we just can't afford to build more prisons.  Just ask California... all those freeways... all those jails.


Think about it.

Um... the dark sweet taste of deep deep thoughts.

Guten Tag, Amerika.

1 comment:

  1. Having played soccer with Germans and Americans, I see the difference that allows them an Autobahn while we are denied. On the pitch, Germans only hit you when they *mean* to.

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